"When you're going through hell, keep going."
Husband's esophageal tumor is malignant.
Monday was the official diagnosis with the official pathology report. Tuesday was a waiting day. Wednesday we saw the surgeon. Today we had the PET scan. Tomorrow we go to have the port inserted for the radiation/chemotherapy.
The plan is radiation/chemo for 8 weeks, hoping the tumor will shrink. As it shrinks, he should slowly be able to eat/drink more. Then surgery to remove lower portion of esophagus, and then tie stomach up to what is left of it. The result will be that he will not be able to eat large amounts at one time, and will need to eat several smaller meals each day. His normal weight is around 175. He has lost 30 lbs. There is not much room for variance any more. He is going into this very weak, dehydrated, and probably malnourished.
Obviously I am a wreck and my "health" plan is out the window for now. I have eaten maybe 500 calories per day most days, with no appetite. I am away from home and have no idea what I weigh. Suddenly it's not important.
What is important, before you tell me that I should take care of myself, is that I take care of myself. I know it and I will do it as soon as we slow down the roller coaster and get a handle on more facts.
Thank you for your prayers, positive thoughts and vibes, and kind and encouraging words. They mean a lot to me.
Michele, I am doing just what you suggested. I am a note-taker, a list-maker, a researcher and an organizer. I have a loose-leaf notebook with tabs and page protectors going, and after just a few days, I can produce any lab report, consultation report, pathology report, test results, color images or phone number anyone asks for. So far, I can tell it has saved valuable time in requesting copies from the original source. Yesterday I was asked for a pathology report and today I was asked for a CT report, both of which I had in my notebook. ;-)
15 comments:
Many, many positive thoughts tor strength and resilience for you both! (((Hugs))))
This is nothing but hell and you must keep on going accepting what you must and doing what you can. I continue to lift you and your husband up in my prayers.
There are no adequate words others than I'm sorry and will continue praying that the early treatment plan goes smoothly. Please keep us posted as you can.
I'm so sorry, and I hope that this treatment works! Remember to take care of yourself too (I know, everyone says it, but truly - do you have someone to help you out? Help take care of things?)
Jo - I am so, so sorry to hear this news. I'm praying hard for strength, fortitude and healing for both of you. Stay brave my friend.
Sending you, your husband and your family my very best.
Way to hang tough and dig in Jo.
Hubs and I will be praying for you two.
The docs might be able to point you to more nutrient dense food for hubby so he can keep some weight during treatment. Liquids. As he begins treatment it will become easier for him to swallow even though he may not feel like it.
If they have not offered it, ask about an oncology nutrition person giving you council when you are able to mentally go there.
Lots of love Jo.
Sending my prayers to your husband and to you. ((Hugs))
Hugs and prayers!!
AND YES to the notebook. I took it everywhere with us!! It became my lifeline. Phone numbers, addresses, dates of testings, surgery's. And take notes, oh did I take notes!!
Jo, I am so very sorry for both of you. I will pray hard for you both to have the strength to go though all that is needed to get your husband back to health. Do your best to take care of yourself and stay strong.
Take care my friend. I know the heartache of a very sick family member. It's hard.
Blessings!!
I wish i could hold your hand. This is an exhauting and scary time for both of you. That is why i I want to hold your hand. I am squeezing your hand now, can you feel it?
Good for you on being super organized and getting that notebook at the ready. That is your lifeline now.
I pray that this round of treatment is tolerable for him and for you. I am thinking of you both throughout the day and sending you strength via these few words. Love, Michele
I was so sorry to hear this news. I'm sending healing thoughts your way and prayers for a full recovery. My best to you and your husband and all of your family.
Very best wishes to you and your husband.
I am truly so, so sorry.
Continued prayers for you and your husband.
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